Flowing From Emptiness (August 2018)

Last Fall April Leffler asked several of us for thoughts on “flowing from emptiness.” What that means to me is allowing me to be in that space of floating and drifting as an awakened being (bodhisattva). Thich Nhat Hanh wrote a great article titled, “The Fullness of Emptiness” (August 6, 2012), where emptiness meant being empty of a separate self and full of everything.

Circulating the Chi that is within and around me during my practice provides an opportunity for everything to reconnect. I become empty of a separate self but full of everything, becoming one with everything: earth, sky, water, soil, plants, animals, you and other beings. I exist outside of and beyond the confines of my physical form. This brings me renewed life.

Flowing from emptiness allows me to be more open to receiving – like the empty cup. It allows me to learn about myself and the impact that actions, non-action, words or silence may have. It’s like a butterfly flapping its wings: it ripples the air throughout the universe. This brings me a closer connection to my feelings and a greater consciousness.

Flowing from emptiness is a truer sense of letting go: of ego, angst, fear, perceptions. Flowing from emptiness gets me closer to working from a center of inner sincerity (teh) and as Justin wanted with T’ai Chi Chih, finding out who and what I truly am.

It felt true and in the moment. But something felt like it was missing. On a recent trip I was drawn to goldstone. Connected to the sacral chakra, it is a stone of ambition, gives you courage and reduces inflammation. It symbolizes the light found in the dark and is helpful for those lost in life. Goldstone promotes emotional balance and amplifies physical energy and vitality. So okay – why me? After further pondering, the layers of the onion begin to peel.

Our move to the Southwest is truly where my soul needs to be. I transitioned to a new job, created a home that feels more like us and focused on designing a calm and peaceful outdoor space. However, I still feel incomplete. I feel disconnected to people who were an integral part of my daily life: my family, friends, students, the MN TCC community and the greater TCC community. I am slightly lost and finding my way. And although I have been unable to attend conference the past few years, I have not forgotten any of you. I hold you close in my heart. I focus on flowing from emptiness to reconnect with everyone and everything. I search for ways to give back to the community, be a resource, be of service. The Goldstone will be a great complement to my TCC practice in helping me find my way.