Drowning In The Countdown

When my daughter was young she would use the English language creatively, as children do. We would gently correct her usage along the way to build a strong foundation in verbal communication. But there was one word she said that we let go because it was so cute. She would say “cumpf-ter-full” rather than “comfortable.” All was well until she entered school and came home one day extremely upset, telling us that other students and her teacher laughed at her when she told them that her chair was cumpfterfull. “How could you let me go on saying that,” she cried at us. “You knew it was wrong!” Telling her that it was because we thought it was so cute didn’t ease her hurt. We had let her down. Today she is a Linguist and Speech Pathologist in the Portland, Oregon area, and one aspect of her vocation is to help people speak correctly.

In Tai Chi Chih, whether students or teachers, there is a continual learning as we re-examine, gently correct and adjust in order to diminish inappropriate movements and forestall potential bad habits. If we are not attentive and ever-evaluative, bad habits can settle in deep and linger long. These have the potential to sour our practice by nibbling away at our meditative attentiveness to our moving, to our groundedness and to the vital force in movement within.

One such nibbling habit can be found in an emphasis on counting repetitions. It can become easy to hold the notion that the movement meditation is achieved through the correct number of repetitions in the prescribed practice. This need for students to count down through the movements has the potential to commandeer and trap one’s awareness in the head. While it seems to be an awareness of the body in motion, it is a flimsy kind of attentiveness to the Chronos (the quantitative-ness of a movement) rather than the Kairos (the quality and vital nature of a movement.)

The needed essential awareness is of the body in movement moving and grounding rather than to the number of movements. It isn’t harmful if we do one repetition less or two repetitions more. How often has a teacher when losing count said, “Let this be number eight.” It is easy to lose count of the repetitions when our awareness is drawn to the soles of our feet, the soles of our soul, and to the soft and steady leading from our tan t’ien. The value in TCC is not in the “how many,” but rather in how we achieve the movements we do. When we let go of the driving need to count “…1, 2, 3” … and grant ourselves permission to give into the flow, perhaps allowing another to count for us, it is easier to engage in the joy of movement.

Try Rocking Motion or Passing Clouds with letting go of the count. Allow yourself or invite your students to settle into the gentle, continual flow until the body signals enough—not from exhaustion, but rather from an inner awareness of it being okay to move on.

Our ultimate awareness of the essential power in movement is key to our practice and meditation. A bad habit or two is not the end of the world, but we don’t do ourselves or our students any favors when we let poor habits settle in and linger deep and unchallenged. A little re-teaching along the way in our gatherings, such as occasionally reading about a movement aloud, or re-watching Justin’s practice videos on the Internet or attending an Intensive course can go a long way in helping keep to the practice and enjoy the benefits of TCC’s moving meditation.