Full Transparency

At the end of the morning practice and meditation, the teacher asks the group for one word to begin a pyramid poem. I heard gratitude. Then came the feeling: thankfulness, meditative, peace, oneness, wholeness, heartfelt. When arranged properly, I discovered that these were more of a feeling than a thought. The final poem:

feel

heartfelt

thankfulness

meditative

gratitude

oneness

peace

These words had emerged from the heart and soul of my being. What’s going on here? This question seems to always repeat, my journey into myself growing deeper. A new me is evolving and I am aware of it. To think and feel is at another level. The floating through heavy air feeling of T’ai Chi Chih is becoming a never-ending fixture in my existence. The vital force energy buzzes within at times.

Because of this practice, life has changed from just a few short years ago. Writing these words would never have happened, the thought terrifying. Full transparency means honesty. I have come to realize I haven’t always been totally honest with myself. Being alone once was a negative experience, yet I felt I was happy. Alone now a highly valued time for practice, reading, writing, reflection, and self-awareness. All very positive. Life embraces us every second, and every breath is a blessing, a gift, not to be taken for granted. A new dimension of happy has been developing: joy.

As the puzzle pieces of the adventure we call “joy thru movement” merge, many things are happening. In the beginning, we hear the words. The mind is overloaded with instruction. We mirror the movements as best we can. Slowly, very slowly for me, the words fade and feeling replaces hearing. We feel the tan t’ien lead the movements more. We feel the weight shift, hip swivels, softness, continuity in our growing relationship with the movement of our body. This eventually becomes what Justin called “T’ai Chi Chih doing T’ai Chi Chih.”

To receive all that T’ai Chi Chih offers one has to practice, and practice regularly. Indeed. I am so grateful, I give thanks.

words 

written 

develops

random nuggets

unveiling

inner

thoughts

bold

visions

awkwardness

uncertainty

believing

seeking

truth

moods

become

genuine 

motivation

promoting

within

change

here

aware

confusion

complicating

intentions

clearly

blurred

life 

evolves

creating

new adventures

dimensions

building

strength 

self

renewed

achievements 

experience

devising

truthful

change