Reorient With TCC

Recently I’ve felt as if I’m living in the early chapter of a science fiction novel, the shell-shocked heroine of my family’s survival story. There is a feeling that something momentous is coming, but I, as the character in the book, cannot see what I cannot see.

My mind quickly points out that my life hasn’t been impacted all that much, not nearly as much as others’ have. As of this writing, tragedy hasn’t hit my family, though I was saddened to hear that seven died at the rehab/nursing home where my dad stayed for more than three months last year, and that 23 more are infected. It feels closer and closer to home, and I know it is still early in this journey. I hesitate to write, knowing how I might look back on my own naivete. The scientist in me wonders what we will lose, and the optimistic former hippie-child envisions what we will gain and heal, what wonders will emerge in our path of human transformation.

Somehow, time still flies by. I try to stay grounded and in my feet through a mental litany of worries and ‘shoulds.’ I resist doing/acting on them, and in doing so, give them more power. I tune out with books, articles, TV dramas and email news updates. I am fatigued from fear, too much media and thinking too much. Time seems to be distorted, which is an odd layer on top of my often relatively normal day. “We are all disoriented,” a friend pointed out the other day.

Thank goodness I have T’ai Chi Chih. I have a powerful tool that I have been honing, perhaps just for this moment. TCC is a wonderful teacher. All of the principles seem amplified in importance in life as it is now. The need to flow softly and without effort, to tune into our center and listen to our feet, to stay grounded in this moment, are all being called forth.

I have been doing many practices on Zoom, and connecting with people all over, as well as practicing here and there on my own. I’m pulling out Justin’s Spiritual Odyssey and Meditation for Healing, which seem written for this time. Soon I’ll return to David Parrish’s new book, Dying to Live, and see what new insights it brings. The Nei Kung comforts me at night.

I have a place to rest, to escape the fear. I have a tool that flows with me, supports me, and reconnects me to myself. TCC reorients me. Thank you, Justin.