Return to Seijaku: COVID Blessing & Invitation

Many years ago my husband and I were in a small shop. We were in search of statuary for the yoga studio I had recently purchased and found success with the purchase of two beautiful bronzes — Ganesh, the remover of obstacles; and Nataraja, Shiva as the divine dancer, the source of all movement, remover of souls from the snare of illusion and complacency, assisting all to come to reside in the center of the universe within the Heart. They were the perfect choices, and they have spoken to many who have entered.

As we were leaving the shop an image of a large wooden sculpture of Kuan Yin, the Goddess of Compassion, captured my attention briefly, and we left. A few weeks later she started showing up in my thoughts: I could see her; I could feel her presence. I was drawn to her; she invited me in…. We went back to visit her, took her picture and went home.

Later that year I found her “spot.” It was a granite countertop on the landing between our loft space where we practiced T’ai Chi Chih, yoga and meditation; our living space downstairs; and our bedroom upstairs. I imagined that we could see her from almost anywhere as we moved through our home and would be under her watchful eye and guiding influence, nudging us to express more kindness and compassion. We said yes to her. We celebrated by purchasing her for my birthday that year. She had been waiting for us and fit perfectly!

We both fell in love with her and acknowledged her each time she drew our attention. Her influence was present and profound. With our move to Portland she has, yet again, her perfect place from which to watch and inform and remind us to pause and examine ourselves. Her influence is calming and life affirming, her knowledge of human suffering, the collection of the tears of our suffering, the washing away of those tears… all without judgement, only compassion.

I recently became strongly attracted to a six-foot tall buddha statue, Amitabha or Amida Buddha, whose head is surrounded by a circle aflame in radiant Light, hands in the Abhayamudra (right hand up, left hand down), the gesture shown by the Buddha immediately after attaining enlightenment, symbolizing fearlessness, strength and inner security. Exactly the traits necessary to meet this moment, this time. He speaks to me! He invites me. Desire, desire, strong desire to have that Buddha standing in our entryway greeting all who enter and to remind me of who and what I really am. Of how to really live this life, boldly. This Energy Sea this Tanden, from below the navel to the soles of the feet, full of the Amida Buddha of Heart and Body. What sermon would this Amida be preaching? (Nei Kung)

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I have spent hours recently reciting and meditating on the Nei Kung during the day. And I have spent hours practicing T’ai Chi Chih as I work my way through each of these challenging days. Then, suddenly an urge, uncloaked, unfettered, struck: the desire to return to Seijaku. Out of the gentle and soothing “touch” of the Chi in my TCC practice there lay the smoldering ember… the fire, the agni… the fire that is me, the cleansing fire of the Chi. The powerful peace of Seijaku breathed life into the fire, and the constant flame of the eternal enshrined in the heart of all human beings, Angustha Matra Purusa … blue … still … smokeless … took residence in the mirror of my consciousness. “Practice!” it called. And so I do.

Every day now, I am drawn to that fire, agni in the Heart, the power of that stillness in the midst of activity that Seijaku offers. The essential triad of practice — soft, continuous (TCC), hard — holding fast, then soft — letting go (Seijaku), neutralizing (Fast Track.) It breathes me…. The entire practice, a profound pranayama of relationship to the Divine through breath. From the State of Emptiness, each man’s body is a body pervading the Universe, his voice is a voice filling the Universe, and his life is a life without limit. (Lotus Sutra) The doors and windows of my heart swing open and life is good, right here, right now. I am invited to share in all of this goodness, fullness.

I don’t know if a six-foot Buddha will end up in my entryway. The one I first mentioned now resides in a local Buddhist temple. There is one traveling from China in a crate on a ship right now. From photos, he is beautiful. We will visit him when he arrives and see if he’s the one. But even if he’s not and even if I never do find “the one,” I have been invited to share in this power that Justin points to through Seijaku, offering fearlessness, strength and inner security — through teh (sincerity,) acquiescence and love. I say yes and thank you to Justin through my practice. We are all invited.