Great Loss Can Be A Gift

Two days ago, I attended funeral visitation for Lane, the husband of one of my T’ai Chi Chih students. I contemplated the great loss my student, Karen, is going through. Karen has been so brave. She was her husband’s primary caregiver as cancer slowly took over his body. I’ve admired Karen’s choice to choose a positive attitude each day, despite adversity. I was inspired by Karen who continued to attend TCC and yoga even after spending part of her nights awake and caregiving. She modeled self-care, selflessness and a deep love for her family.

I am reminded that TCC helped me through my own greatest human loss – the sudden death of my grandmother. TCC was the only activity that took away the physical pain and emptiness inside my body. Each practice lessened the pain and gave me hope that I would recover from this great loss. Each practice brought me one step closer to peace and a return to wholeness.

I needed to practice TCC to heal. Understanding myself, I created the goal of attending a TCC teacher accreditation. It would help me improve my own practice and encourage me to practice something that was helping me heal from the inside out. Once I arrived at accreditation, my goal was met before the week started. Passing or failing was irrelevant. TCC had helped me recover from grief and the great loss of a loved one.

I did pass and became a TCC teacher in March 2005, which was 10 months after Grandma’s passing. I did not intend to teach TCC after becoming a teacher; I thought I would teach during retirement in 33 years. By the end of the accreditation week, I still needed to practice TCC for my own benefit. I knew myself well and knew I needed a goal. Teaching would be a great way to keep practicing. I offered a beginning class through community education in the small town where I attended high school. The first class had 15 participants, many of whom continue to practice today. I have been teaching ever since.

At a recent practice, as I looked around the circle of faces while we moved, I was filled with gratitude for the opportunity to teach TCC. I am grateful even for my own grief over the loss of my Grandma, which helped bring the gift of teaching and practicing TCC into my life. Sometimes a great loss can bring your biggest and best gifts. My hope is for Karen and her family to receive many gifts through their loss. With time and patience, may the gifts come.