Justin’s absence acknowledged, mourned

Justin’s physical absence from the conference this year was blinding. I experienced it as both a foreshadow of an inevitability and an echo of a loss I have experienced since my father passed away September 7, 2001, at 85 years of age. After my father passed on I felt starkly alone in the world and strangely afraid.

My father lived with me his last seven years affording me a closeness and familiarity in those final years not experienced by my siblings. It also brought a very harsh and unexpected pain, unshared by my sibs when that daily physical presence was no longer there. We all missed Justin’s presence at the conference and no doubt at some level dealt with the eventual permanence it suggested. I can imagine that for those who are fortunate enough to have frequent contact with him it will be acutely felt. This conference allowed us all to be touched by the significance of this eventuality and see how we might respond.

Perhaps I was not alone in the influence of these tumultuous emotions swirling about my being as I struggled with the question put before us regarding the preparation and accreditation of new teachers. I am grateful that room was made to accommodate the sharing of feelings, ideas and a few solutions. It was not what I came expecting but in retrospect it was necessary.

I believe the extent to which T’ai Chi Chih practice spreads in the world will depend on how firmly we are rooted at the eternal Source. Justin is leaving an incredible gift and he has entrusted it to Ed Altman as head of the TCC community and to all of us as teachers. My concern is that its purity be preserved for all generations. It would seem that in order to assure its purity our teachers must be well grounded and consistent in the quality of the movements. We need also to make a space for those who wish to continue to deepen their practice without becoming teachers. I believe it is wise to address this issue now while we are relatively small in number. The question then is, how? Most likely there is more than one solution and no one remedy is likely to be perfect nor without the ability to be modified as needed.

As we continue to grow in numbers there will undoubtedly be many decisions to be made, decisions for which Justin will not be here to share his wisdom or concerns. I trust that just as we explored our weight shift during this conference, moving too far to one side or the other before we came to find the place of optimal balance and strength, so too that position will be found regarding this current question before us.

Now that we have had a chance to share, let us attempt to set aside our swirling, limited human thought and trust the Chi and Prana will guide the way now and in the future. May its wisdom guide our appointed Head of the T’ai Chi Chih community.

With utmost sincerity,

– Linda Riska Williams
Camarillo, CA