Processing the Gathering at Home

Reflecting on our own Minnesota gathering to mark the 50th anniversary of T’ai Chi Chih (TCC), I see those signposts, my practice, and the community in which I live and breathe are all of a piece for me. They do not stand alone but are a living experience. Whole, like a dream is whole, like a story is whole.

One of the old questions I bring to my practice and to my life is how does softness feel? I glanced over at our lead in the midst of Around the Platter. There it was. I could feel Chi moving through her wrists and fingertips. That moment held a complete teaching transmission. I felt the softness and extension through the wrists.

Softness and collapse are usually tangled up for me. I have mistaken collapse for flexibility. It has taken decades for me to patiently release and free each tangled fiber. It is ongoing. It’s not an idea that can be resolved in an explanation or copying a posture, but a feeling thing, a perspective thing, an attitude thing, a being thing.

There is something beyond yet inside of me that is patient. There are teachers among us. There are sign posts. My practice shows me how to gradually open to that something that this small self cannot contain, to spot the teachers and the signposts. For all of this, I am grateful.